🗂️Keep in Mind The Out-of-Touch Adults' Guide to Kid Culture: Drake Vs. Kendrick Lamar

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I believe in cooperation and mutually beneficial solutions, but conflict is a part of life too—so this week, I’m taking a look at conflict in four forms: rapper vs. rapper, man vs. machine, college student vs. college student, and cat vs. cat. So read on if you want to know why Kendrick hates Drake, how to tell a bot from a person, and are curious about the meanest cat on the internet.

The Kendrick Lamar and Drake feud, explained​

You’d have to be very out of touch to not have at least heard about the ongoing war between rappers Drake and Kendrick Lamar, but if you want to know what it’s actually about, what brought two of the biggest rappers in the game to open lyrical warfare, and why it's important, I’m going to attempt to explain it all, god help me. Settle in; it's a deep dive.

The Drake vs. Kendrick beef has been bubbling under the surface for more than a decade, so there’s a deep rabbit hole of side feuds, tweets, interview quotes, verses on mixtapes, and tons of gossip and speculation to get lost in. You could write a book about it, and I’m sure people will, but on the broadest level, the beef began as a style war: Drake is a more commercial, pop rapper; Lamar is a headier, more “conscious” rapper. Think of it as Michael Jackson vs. Prince, a comparison Lamar mentions on “Like That” the song that kicked the idling feud into high gear in March. On the track, by Lamar, Future, and Metro Booming, Lamar raps: “Your best work is a light pack, and Prince outlived Mic Jack," along with a string of other disses.


It may have started as a “who’s the realest?” style dust-up, but the Kendrick vs. Drake beef quickly blew up into a war of words that rivals the viciousness of Biggie vs. Pac or that time nerd core rappers took on Alex Trebek. Both Drake and Lamar cross lines by directing lyrics at their rival’s families, and Kendrick took it even further.

Drake responded to “Like That” “with “Push Ups” few weeks later. After aiming a few lines at Future and dismissing Metro Booming by only mentioning him to say he should “shut up and make some drums,” Drake turns to the main course, taking shots at Lamar’s collaborations with Taylor Swift and Maroon 5, his height, shoe size, mixed reaction to Lamar’s Mr. Morale & The Big Steppers album, and a litany of other rap beef insults, including saying that Lamar can’t respond because Taylor Swift’s album is coming out. Speaking of Swift, Drake also released “Taylor Made Freestyle” that uses AI-generated verses from Tupac and Snoop Dogg to diss Lamar, but it was quickly taken down after legal threats from Tupac’s estate.


Lamar’s response, “Euphoria” is a definite escalation. It’s a blistering, six-minute rant that mentions Drake being an absent father, and ends with an ominous warning: “If you take it there, I'm takin' it further. Psst, that's somethin' you don't wanna do.” Lamar then dropped “6:16 in L.A,” a more impressionist take on the diss-track genre, that gives an overall vision of Drake as an out-of-touch phantom haunting a glittering empty mansion, unable to sleep, and surrounded by friends on his payroll who aren’t loyal to him.


Drake shot back with “Family Matters,” where he suggests that one of Lamar’s children was actually fathered by Dave Free, Lamar’s manager, and accuses him of being abusive and unfaithful to his wife.


Lamar’s “meet the grahams” is aimed at Drake’s children. It begins with this line for Drake’s son, “Dear Adonis, I'm sorry that man is your father,” and goes on from there to accuse Drake of having a number of illegitimate children, employing sex offenders, paying for sex, and having a secret daughter.


In keeping with the two-for-the-price-of-one diss tracks, Lamar also released “Not Like Us,” a track that comes close to straight up accusing Drake of being a child molester. Including this instant classic line: “Why you trollin' like a bitch? Ain't you tired? Tryna strike a chord and it's probably A-Minor.”


The final shot in the war, as of this posting, is Drake’s “The Heart Part 6.” In it, Drake says that the supposed secret daughter he has is fake: ”We plotted for a week and then we fed you the information/ A daughter that’s 11 years old, I bet he takes it/ We thought about giving a fake name or a destination/ But you so thirsty, you not concerned with investigation.” And goes on to say that he has never been with anyone underage, and almost seems to underplay the feud, casting it as something he’s not all that concerned about anyway.


And that’s where the beef stands as of May 6.

As for who's winning, it's a personal thing, but Kendrick is winning. Drake's been outclassed since the beginning, and his last track is just weird. It comes across like someone losing an argument on the internet. He mostly seems defensive, and then he tries to play it off like he doesn't care, and the idea that he set Lamar up with fake information is an interesting tactic; even if that really happened, I'm not sure "you don't fully fact check" is an effective diss in 2024. Overall it feels like Drake is trying to wave the white flag, but without losing face, so this might be the end of the beef. But I guess we’ll see.

"Human or Not" taking over internet​

From rapper vs. rapper to man vs. machine. A new website called Human or Not is taking the Turing test to the masses. The web-based game/chat program lets you chat with a faceless stranger for a couple of minutes and then guess if they are a human or a bot. The original Turing test called for a five-minute conversation, but if you’re good at spotting AI, you only need two. Here’s the record of my first 10 games (yes, I’m bragging).

Credit: Stephen Johnson/ai21

And here’s what it looks like when you, a human, tries to sound like a computer while a computer tries to sound like a human.

Credit: Stephen Johnson/ai21

I’m open to the possibility that whatever data you can glean from thousands of people trying to spot bots will eventually be used to make the AI harder to identify, and to the possibility that Human or Not isn’t really telling you whether you’re talking to an AI or not because it’s all AI. Also: I am AI already and so are you.

Viral video of the week: University of Mississippi Protests​

The third leg in my depressing tripod of dissent is this week’s viral video, in which a group of pro-Palestinian protesters at the University of Mississippi are beset by a group of counterprotestors and things get racist, ugly, and depressing. The video, posted by Twitter/X by Ashton Pittman, shows a group of white frat guys, some wearing American flag overalls, jeering, chanting “lock her up,” and making monkey noises at a black woman. It’s a snapshot of what’s happening on campuses across the country as pro-Palestinian protest become more common.

While most people responded by condemning the dude making the monkey noises (including his own fraternity, Phi Delta Theta, who kicked him out, and the University itself, which launched an investigation) Congressman Mike Lee of Georgia posted the video on Twitter/X with the caption “Ole Miss taking care of business.” Because that’s where we are now.

Viral video of the week number 2: POV cat chase​

This week’s bonus viral video is a cat video, But the cats aren’t being cute, they’re going at it like Drake and Kendrick Lamar. TikTok user max20499 attaches a camera to his cat and posts videos POV of the scraps, streetfights, and chases it gets into around the neighborhood. This particularly exciting chase has been viewed over 78 million times since it was posted April 25. I don’t know enough about cat behavior to say for sure, but Max’s cat seems like a serious menace to the other cats in the neighborhood.
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